Petrified-Inspired Lyrics (A Monster's Lament)

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Petrified-Inspired Lyrics (A Monster's Lament)

Postby archaephyrryx » 19 Jul 2012 22:50

I just finished writing the lyrics to a song slightly inspired by Petrified, from H8_Seed's Mythozoology series. I need a vocalist who can sing operatically, not rapping or anything like that. Preferably a tenor, though I will listen to anyone who wants to submit anything. The lyrics can be found below, and I will be posting the notes later when I get around to it. Any questions, feel free to ask. Also, any help or constructive criticism will be greatly appreciated.


Lyrics:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ldorwGeAUxrLSXEV_h3LH9-rQRqQ6c_nccOqnqkPflo/edit

Music:
-To Be Posted-
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Re: Petrified-Inspired Lyrics (A Monster's Lament)

Postby archaephyrryx » 20 Jul 2012 11:21

Kyoga wrote:When you get the music behind this I'll consider giving it a shot.
Neoopratic is sorta my style... but i'm not sure what kind of Operatic singing you're looking for.
Could you provide an example?


Ponyphonic's The Moon RIses is a good example of the kind of singing that I want.
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Re: Petrified-Inspired Lyrics (A Monster's Lament)

Postby FlyingNinjaBannanas » 20 Jul 2012 16:49

Wait a moment, I would love to give this a shot if you would let me. As soon as notes and an instrumental are uploaded.

I need an excuse to sing, if I don't make the cut, I'll just upload it as a cover. Nice lyrics by the way, the only thing I think could be better are the words chosen to rhyme, in my opinion, they could be a bit more complex. But this could be just a nuisance from reading it without music. When an instrumental and notes come out, it would be a lot easier to tell.
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Re: Petrified-Inspired Lyrics (A Monster's Lament)

Postby archaephyrryx » 20 Jul 2012 21:16

Kyoga wrote:i'm in the same boat as bannanas. :3
Having the song would make this a lot better to work with.


It's just something I pulled out of my flank, so I didn't get a chance to make an instrumental or note-preview yet. I have an electric keyboard that I can use, but I don't have a power cable for it yet. I will try to find it, or, if worst comes to worst, by a new one at Radio Shack. I'll probably upload it in a few days, as I am going to a meetup tomorrow and will be out for pretty much the whole day. Thanks for jumping on my bandwagon though, and I will try to improve the lyrics in the meantime. I didn't work for very long on it, but I will try to do more.
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Re: Petrified-Inspired Lyrics (A Monster's Lament)

Postby archaephyrryx » 23 Jul 2012 20:53

Got the link. Pay attention to only the notes. As I can't make sure I have the perfect meter, take the meter with a grain of salt and use your judgement with the lyrics. If you need better quality, I could try harder. I made this using Garageband and an electric piano.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/hpxiamggm8nxp8h/monster%27s_lament.mp3
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Re: Petrified-Inspired Lyrics (A Monster's Lament)

Postby Thedumplingz » 26 Jul 2012 04:14

archaephyrryx wrote:I just finished writing the lyrics to a song slightly inspired by Petrified, from H8_Seed's Mythozoology series. I need a vocalist who can sing operatically, not rapping or anything like that. Preferably a tenor, though I will listen to anyone who wants to submit anything. The lyrics can be found below, and I will be posting the notes later when I get around to it. Any questions, feel free to ask. Also, any help or constructive criticism will be greatly appreciated.


Lyrics:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ldorwGeAUxrLSXEV_h3LH9-rQRqQ6c_nccOqnqkPflo/edit

Music:
-To Be Posted-


I like the Lyrics ^^

i was just wondering, i find it easier to rap if you lay them out like this

My dear foals, why did you go Into this forest dark - A
Dangers are abundant here; You’ll find no cutie mark - A

I’m sorry now that I must end Your short and precious life - B
To each their own, you are now stone I’m sorry for this strife - B


but once i do that. i realise that later on in the song...

go wandering in the night Deep beneath the pale moonlight
I am banished to this place Do not look upon my face
If you sense my presence, run Or your life will then be done
I shall not stop, I shall not yield Until my eyes have been revealed


but it does work

i'm just confused that you switched from
laying them out like this

My dear foals, why did you go
Into this forest dark - A
Dangers are abundant here;
You’ll find no cutie mark - A

to


I go wandering in the night -A
Deep beneath the pale moonlight -A
I am banished to this place - B
Do not look upon my face - B

then back to

I was born amidst the trees
where monsters lurk in wait - A
For years I’ve felt no sympathy
only fear and hate - A

so from a first glance at the docs it looks like you have 14 sets of 4 bars
but when you work out the rhymes and stuff it ends up about much less

any time you've done something like this

My dear foals, why did you go
Into this forest dark - A
Dangers are abundant here;
You’ll find no cutie mark - A

its 2 lines that you've just split into 4

and if you do something like this

I go wandering in the night -A
Deep beneath the pale moonlight -A
I am banished to this place - B
Do not look upon my face - B

that is 4 lines

i find it confusing.


But y'know personal preference
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