<Electronic><Pony> Vinylicious Remix

[FleshBright]

I feel like I've improved a lot while working on this so I'm hoping for some feedback to see what could have been made better.
Anything is appreciated :]
https://soundcloud.com/kneslo/vinylicious-f-bright-remix

[itroitnyah]

The mixing needs improvement. A lot of the elements drown each other out, and the lyrics are understandable, but not really there. The beat and melody and harmonies sound really quiet and hard to understand. The kick and snare are a bit hard to hear, but not that hard. Be sure to EQ them, set up which of the elements are the "leaders" and need to be at the front of the action.

Composition sounds great, and I don't see any problems with the structuring.

[FleshBright]

Ty ty! Yea I had a hard time deciding how to put the track together and ended up just putting tons of stuff on top of each other without really eqing anything or picking an obvious melody or harmony. Also didn't realize how much I messed up the kick and snare layering and eqing until after I put it up :[ I really got more than a handful to work on.

[Guthey]

The beginning is kinda awkward, vinyl is talking, her voice picks up, but doesn't go anywhere, then picks up again and remains constant. Just that awkward pause at :39 seems out of place. And the synth seems a little too repetitive, it sounds cool, but just too much of it gets a little boring. and I agree, i can't tell which melody is the lead and which is just background. the last part, sounds pretty good though,2:45, at least the synth has a little variation, but is still a little too repetitive. and I feel 1:57-2:44 is a little too long, maybe cut it short, or just add more sounds, all in harmony of course, don't just throw sounds in.1:51 seems like a prime time to establish your lead and to add your sounds one by one, don't throw all them in at once, but don't spread them too far either. it's a pretty good song, just the sounds seem off, and the synth is a little too repetitive.

[FleshBright]

Ty Guthey! Yea I can definitely agree with your feedback. I put the lead synth together way too quickly and without as much thought as I should have. Also thought about shortening certain parts so I guess I was just a little indecisive or something. I should have made a plan or something for my song. The feedback helps loads. Definitely feeling good about knowing where and how to improve :]

[Injustrial]

I feel the beginning of Vinyl's voice is out of rhythm. A plugin like Newtone could help you get the consonants right where the hits are, giving it a more concise feeling.

The hollow lead starting at 0:55 is a bit too prominent for my liking. I feel it could be brought down a bit in volume and maybe given some wide reverb to make it less sharp in my ears. The piano-esque melodies work very well and I would perhaps widen them out a bit more with a stereo widener or similar effect.

I would personally have given Vinyl a bit of a break now and then, she feels almost spammy now. Try replacing the voice samples with a new synth and see where that takes you.

I like the outtro, with the gradually fading lowpass (?) filter and the finishing sounds are gorgeous. Perhaps write a new line with the same synth preset and use that in place of Vinyl's voice.

I think this has some real potential, just needs some polish and tweaks, like all music

[FleshBright]

Thanks Injustrial! I had some real trouble working on the vocals and I didn't know plugins like newtone existed so I'm definitely looking forward to using that. I like the advice you're throwing at me; tried to focus on stereo effects and reverb on this track and forgot so yeah I think I'm actually go back and rework the song. It hurts but I agree that the vocals were kinda spammy and I feel like I could have put a lot more time into them as well as the main lead. Ty again for the feedback. Definitely giving me mad inspiration to practice.

[Injustrial]

You're more than welcome. I know far too well the feeling of redoing stuff. Every song I've done has started as something I thought sounded cool. Then I came back to it and decided I hated it, ripped it out and started over again, only keeping a few elements of the original work.

BTW, stuff like Slicex might also work for you, especially since you're probably only going to change the rhythm of the vocals, not the pitch. It's a bit easier to work with and more lightweight on the ol' CPU

[FleshBright]

Well I spent so much more time redoing this song than I originally spent making it so I'm totally burnt out on this one. I didn't know redoing songs would be so annoying but I think I did better on this one than on my first try even if I changed the song quite a bit. Gah I just wanna change the entire song.
Here's my version two : https://soundcloud.com/kneslo/vinylicious-retry-1-f-bright