<Original><Electro-House(?)> Back when you were mine

[Starcrossed]

Hi all, just another wannabe brony musician with his first song here and I’m looking for some C&C on it. I’m pretty pleased with how it turned out, though the vocals are a strange train wreck mashup of 4 different takes because I did them while suffering from a cold and within a limited time span of recording (have to record at school because my house has no rooms with decent acoustics).

http://soundcloud.com/starcrossedbrony/back-when-you-were-mine

Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cT-1xu_2my0

The song’s based around the speculated Celestia x Discord relationship before his interment in statue form (yeah, because that’s never been done before... right?) and the lyrics are a bit overdone perhaps but as my first set of ‘proper’ lyrics they seem to have turned out alright.
Things I believe I can do better next time;
- Better recording (obviously)
- Shorter instrumental sections, IMO, the ones I did here (mostly the intro and 'middle 8' instrumentals) were a tad too long.
- More subtlety in the mixing, just little things here and there which don’t wreck the song but could be better for the future.

All advice is appreciated.
Good day all

Edit: added youtube link