by Callenby » 16 Mar 2013 21:04
Once again this is a genre I have little experience in so once again you must take everything I say with a grain of salt. I also don't know what exactly you intend to use this for so my comments could be completely irrelevant.
Now that my caveats are out of the way, here are my thoughts.
Overall, I like it even though much of it feels a shade too busy. To my mind there's so much going on so quickly that I'm not getting enough of a sense of grounding. I'd say you should test out slowing down the tempo a bit and mapping out precisely which voices will get speedier roles and which will get slower ones. If everything part of a song is excessively rushed then the listener could wind up feeling exhausted. The percussion might be a good place to focus on first. The theme and loop stood out to me as needing this the most.
Also, the vocals are too processed for my taste; it's difficult to make out what's being said.
As a side note, if you're thinking of adding more to this then in my opinion there ought to be some more diversity in timbre, but if not then it's fine. Let me just add that you've chosen the specific voices well for what you've shown so far.
Finally, I would recommend that you consider allowing more time for your ideas to be elaborated (if that makes sense). I get the sense that there could be more done with each section. As they are now it feels like the ideas are over faster than they have to be.
Or maybe the only problem is that I just have overly delicate sensibilities. I hope I could help at least a little but, like I said, take all of this with a grain of salt.
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