<Non-pony><Original><Downbeat Electronica> Mindframe

[FrostShard]

https://soundcloud.com/the-frost-shard/mindframe-first-impression

This is the first of a set of songs I plan of writing, especially inspired by the works of Dutch producer Secede. This track in particular is for VINXIS' soulless afternoons compilation album. Although there might be minor changes, I guess it's technically finished, so I didn't bother with the WIP tag.

General feedback would be appreciated as well as some specific points;

The atmosphere it creates. Does it feel like a journey of sorts? Or something else?

Is the intro filled out enough? Does it need more detail?

Does it feel particularly downbeat? Chilled out?

Is the repetition of the choir pattern very noticeable nearing the end of the song?

The mix in general. Especially that sub bass. (threw it together in massive to replace another bass)

Interested to hear any feedback.

[Guthey]

Wow, this is pretty awesome, I never really heard music like this, I definitely need to get into this type of music.

Anyways, that sub bass just sounds kind of amateur. There doesn't seem to be much definition to it, it just sounds like a filler, but i'm pretty sure a small amount of tweaking could fix.
From :35 to 1:55 the seems a little bland, like more could be going on, but I'm not too familiar with this genre so it may be like that for a reason, so I can't really say much.

It feels pretty down beat to me especially at 3:00-3:28. I just imagined like I was watching the credits of some movie like Chronicle or The Invisible or The Butterfly Effect. A very ambient feel, but it has a nice beat to separate it just being ambiance. I also felt like I was watching some extremely dramatic movie seen like that of Requiem of a Dream during 3:38- 4:10, it's very soothing. I imagined not exactly going on a journey, but just watching some very epic/dramatic scene during 4:47- 5:20. The ending is very nice.

I couldn't even tell there was choir repetition, so that would be a no.

5:34 to the end is very good IMO. I just imagined something from Max Payne 3, since that game soundtrack, or just the environment has that " relaxed, yet there is more to come feel." I imagined just like some shot of a sunset fast-forwarded and a city in the distance. Reminded me of the movie "Crash." And the last 3 seconds reminded me of the ending from from Lalibach's "B machina."

The mixing sounded pretty good, the only that really stood out to me was that sub bass, just sounded a little too generic. Everything else was very good. I'm going to look up more Downbeat electronica now.

[Injustrial]

There's a lot of stuff going on here and with that in mind, I'd have to say the mixing is very well executed. As pointed out earlier, I think the subbass is a bit lacking. I'd either increase it or add another layer, an octave higher, since it doesn't seem to be able to carry that part on its own. If you go the layer route, you can remove the higher bass as you bring the other elements in, creating some nice synergy while keeping a balance in the track.

Atmosphere: Yes, this feels like a journey to me. I think of moody bars, depressing skylines and neon. Almost 1930's Chicago and depression era.

Does it feel Chilled out: Yes it does! Very much so. The arpeggiated chord (?) part at 3:00 was very nicely psychedelic and gave me a very dreamy vibe. Perhaps consider lowering it a bit, though. It shook me out of the dreamy haze I was in. Not too much, since it gives a nice dimension to what you've already started to convey.

The repetition of the choir pattern doesn't seem like a bad thing for me. It ties the track together, imo.

I seriously enjoy the psychedelic sounds you've made, and the melancholic choir helps build a very effective contrast. The ending in particular stands out, since it feels like I've broken out and there's hope, albeit slim and fragile. I just have to repeat myself here, it is SO DAMN MOODY!

[Guthey]

Newwww!! I was gunna listen to it again! Why must remove ;_;

[FrostShard]

I'm sorry!

I'm making some changes...

Here's a temporary link to the old version - https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/s/j6y ... ession.mp3

[FrostShard]

Alright.

Thanks for all the detailed feedback, it has really helped me get motivated.

link - https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/s/lzi ... 20test.mp3
This version is not a final mix, as I don't have access to my monitors right now, but should be indicative of the changes I've made.

Mainly just filled in the early parts a little more, changed the sub bass a little, but mainly made it not have to carry the whole first section.

Also brought down the rolls at ~3:00 to just be a little more subtle.

Let me know what you think.

[Injustrial]

I think this works better than the previous version. Mix seems to be pretty much there, from what I can tell. I'm only on standard headphones atm, but I can't hear anything stand out as obvious.